Friday, September 08, 2006

Fear

Two months have past... i went home, had some fun and added one more person to my short list of loved ones...now the time has come to get back to my routine... the same old same old school routine which i have taken up for the past year... Back in canada and back in school... teachers are great, life here is great and students...well... they're ok... and as usual...life goes on...it has to..

Fear; to some people, a measure of courage... to others, a subject better left behind the shut cache... fear can come in many forms; fear of creepy crawlers, fear of heights, fear of commitment, fear of death, fear of failure, fear of dissapointing others, and sometimes, the fear of fear itself...

Fear deprives us of our guts, our audacity, our endurance... and yet at the same time, fear could unleash our greatest, most invicible predominance... Fear could cause some to flee without thought, without hesitation, without wits but with the speed of light... fear could also cause some to stand their ground and fight.. courage driven by fear, ironic but true... My greatest fear on the other hand, cant be solved or overcomed by running or fighting... cant be overcomed by mere bones and muscles... cant be overcomed by kicking and screaming... My fear goes far beyond the physical ways of us feeble mortals... The fear of losing someone, the fear of losing a loved one, a cherished one, a dearest one... How could that fear ever be overcomed? how can this fear of which can never be predicted or manipulated be overcomed? How can a fear of which can't be reached, touched or felt be overcomed by mere mortals? How can a man live without his loved ones? How can a man go on without the affection, amity, or amour of those whom he loves so much that he cant let go? How will anyone succeed in life without the utter presence of a loved one? Fear has not deprived me of anything... fear has driven me to hang on... as long as i can... to the ones i love and hold dearest... to live life to the fullest....