What I Want...

I want to hold your hands

so much that I'm afraid I might never let go

I want to feel your hands

holding my cheeks in your palms

I want to hug you tight

so tight that I'm afraid you might suffocate

I want to feel your skin

under my sheets every night

I want to kiss your lips

so sweet that I'm afraid you might get sick

I want to kiss you all the time

and your lip is just the start

I want to feel your warmth

so much that I'm afraid of this cold lonely night

I want to make you feel the warmth

just like eating an apple pie

I want to hear your voice

so much that I'm afraid I might have nothing to say

I want to hear that all-so-cute laugh you have

still just as cute even when we're in bed

I want to feel your cheeks

so much that I'm afraid I might squeeze it red

I want to feel your cheeks

even more if its from the inside

I want to feel you

so much that I'm afraid I... will be afraid

I want to feel you

every single inch of you

I will always love you

so much that I'm afraid you might never understand

I will always miss you

Both physically and emotionally

I will always want you

for all that you are; even more for all that you aren't

I will always be there for you

beside you and inside you

So hold me in your heart;

Hug me in your sleep;

Kiss me in your dreams;

Remember the warmth;

and I'll remember your voice;

the sweetness from your cheeks;

Can you feel me inside you sweetie?

Purple Butterfly

Will you be my purple butterfly?

Let me tell you a lil' story. There once was a female butterfly named Violet. She had beautiful wings made up of a dark blueish purple. She was grand and stunning. Many male butterflies were friendly with Violet; some were even over-friendly. But Violet never took interest in anything before. You see, butterflies are attracted to butterflies with similar wings. And it isn't easy to find a mate with purple wings. Violet was lonely and wanted nothing more than to find her companion.

One day, something caught Violet's eye. It was a bold shade of purple, even grander than Violet's very own set of wings. She was jealous but even more so, in love. She asked for name but there was no answer. She tried to mingle but to no avail. Yet, Violet had never met any butterfly with such great colour. She refused to give in. Even if it were to be for the rest of her live, she would never give in. So, everyday, she would fly around this bold colour, waiting for an answer, waiting for a response, any response would do. She just wanted something. But, no, there was no reply. She would fly and fly, constantly hovering above, "I need to get his attention" Violet thought. When she became too tired to fly, she couldn't help but lay on the bold purple. And when she awoke, she continues to hover above. This fascination...no, this addiction to the bold purple had made Violet obsessed, to the point of forgetting about food and water.

Days had passed and Violet's strength is starting to fade. Her will remains adamant but starvation shows no mercy. Violet began to slowly fall, as she fights, she flaps her wings with furious intentions but falls nonetheless, like a dry leaf in mid-autumn. As she falls, all she could think of was the bold purple. This colour she had never seen, this colour she never will see...this colour she can never have. She falls tirelessly on an iris, a flower with bold purple petals; one's that look like magical butterfly wings. As the wind takes away her life, an iris petal lands over Violet's body. She had finally got what she wanted, even if it were just a little late.

You had many choices of other butterflies. Yet, you chose an iris instead. Unlike the story, I treasure your life more than you can imagine. Afterall, you've already changed my life. Let me be there with you. I want to be there for the rest of your life; I'll hold you till the very end. So, will you be my purple butterfly?

Being with You

Its not a silly lil moment

this relationship we have

I'm sure of it

Even if I don't know where we're headed

This distance is chipping away

slowly at our hearts

Its like I can't get a hand

on the depths of your heart

All I have is the voice I hear

and I'm desperate for more

No...I'm even more afraid

Afraid that I might lose just a little bit of you

I'll fight my way through

this wall thats keeping us apart

I'll kick down the door

thats holding us back

We have problems

I know we do

But none of it matters,

not as much as being with you...

I'll continue to hold your hands

in this cloudy storm

Didn't I tell you...

I'll never let go

Magical Land Behind Your Eyes

My eyes are tired

I've been staring at my phone

for way too long now...

I just want to hear your call

I force myself to stay awake

I need you to be by my side

so I wouldn't have to be alone

under this cold cold blanket

Let me put my hand around your waist

Give me a chance

to kiss you on the lips

as I hold you from behind

This might all sound like a fantasy

It might as well be

Cause I couldn't imagine myself this addicted

to such a pretty voice

Lets live this fantasy together

let me be your shining white knight

I'll save you from this reality

You will always be in my dreams

Grey Skies

There comes a time
when the sky seems grey
when the empty streets seem endless

There comes a time
when it's lonely even when you're not alone
when all you see are shadows even when there is light

There comes a time
when life trips you over and you land on your face
when people have nothing nice to say

There comes a time
when smoking a cigarette just isn't enough
when alcohol can't take away the pain

There comes a time
when your heart tears apart
when your feet can't walk the talk

There comes a time
when you're just tired of everything
when all you want is to give up

But even leafless trees live through harsh winters
even a fish can live beneath 6 feet of ice
All might seem lost
But it's just frozen in frost

I Hear it All

I hear everything. The winter's wind blowing against the concrete walls that surround this stagnant world of mine, with you as it's center. The undying clock on my wall, ticking away toward the time where I can hold you once again; this time, I won't be able to let go. The clustered thoughts I have of work, classes, home and a future; every one of which overshadowed by the beautiful voice of a girl from what I can only presume to be a dream. Your voice echoes in my head gently like a caressing hand on my cheek. I can hear it all;

The way you say "Hello"
the way you say "Dear"
the way you say "I hate you"
the way you say "I love you"

I can hear everything from
"yoooo" said with such a cute tone
to "hao" when you listen to what I have to say...

It is hard to understand why I hear so much of your voice even when you're not here. Your voice is all I have and it's worth more than you can imagine. Its almost like an endless addiction; the constant urge to hear anything and everything you have to say. But, still, I want more than just to hear your voice. I want what I can't have yet, but I have what I never thought I could have had...you.

Sweet Dreams

Rest now honey,
knowing that I'll protect you

Lie down next to me,
knowing that I'll lie with you

Close your tired eyes,
knowing I'll be there to wake you up

Sleep tight baby,
knowing I'll kiss you even in your dreams

Goodnight my love,
rest assured, I will always stand by you

I Now Know...

What can fuel this passion?
if not love...
What leaves me speechless?
if not you...

I now know
what its like to be a river
flowing endlessly
in search of the sea

I now know
what its like to be the sea
travelling across the world
in search of land

I now know
what its like to be sand
always stepped on helplessly
waiting to be moved only by others

I now know
what its like to be a mountain
grand and magnificent
but, for the very same reason, cold and alone

I now know
what its like to be human
wishful and selfish
and stronger because of that

I now know
what its like to love
caring, sweet, playful and passionate
because of you, its so much more interesting

Who can fuel my love?
if not you...
Who can love you whole-heartedly?
if not me...

Picture This

The sun sets with a bright purple fade in the endless open sky. The moon starts to show signs of awakening as it glows a dim light. Listen to the birds as they escape into the darkness. Their wings flapping furiously to get back to a place they call home. Their voices fill the sky with a beautiful melody. The air comes to a thin cold; just a little colder than it was just minutes ago. The hairs on your skin stand tall to prepare for war against the wind, even though they know victory is not within sight. Watch closely as the leaves playfully fall from the trees; like a little child running in circles, forever unsure of when its about to hit the ground, only sure that it will. The moon lights up like a strong white flame in the night. The sea of stars start to come out of hiding, now that it is time for them to shine. It is that time of the night again, where hidden animals begin to make unmistakable music. The invisible frog plays the bass to the voice of stray cats mothering their high pitched kittens. Thats when the rhythm of barking dogs step in the symphony. And then there's the weird screech of an insect, which from the sounds of it, has to be of the cricket family; it's call is made up of short but loud intermissions, almost like an out-of-tune violin. By this time, darkness has consumed all things far and wide, with the moon as its only nemesis. But somehow, even with bare minimal sight of all things, it still remains a masterpiece. This picture... the Picture of Life, that is.

"If" is just Another Word

If I were a boy
I would hug you like my blanky
and eat you like sweet sweet candy

If I found courage
I would kiss you in public
even if I know you will give me a kick

If I knew shame
I would leave behind my giant ego
as long as you never let me go

If I had a life
you would be the centre of it all
just like the air in a ball

If I'm lost
you would be my direction
I love getting so much affection

If I ever had a home
you would definitely be in it
because home is only where you see fit

If I were a man
I'd look right into your eyes
tell you "I never want to say goodbye"

But then,
"if" is not an option
not when you're waiting for me just around the bend
I'll run to you with all my passion

Happy Valentine's Day

I want to say

when life doesn't go your way

you can always head my way

I want to say

when your medicine doesn't work

you can always count on me to take care of you

I want to say

when you're not sure of life

you can always be sure of me

I want to say

when you feel like you're alone

you can always call out my name

I want to say

when you have nowhere else to run

you can always run to me

I want to say

when your bed is cold

you can always lean on me

Laugh when you want to,

I'll laugh with you

and I'll even let you make fun of me

Cry when you need to,

I'll be your shoulder

I'll wipe those tears and hold you close

Run where you want to,

I'll run by your side

till we're grey and old

Fall when you have to,

I'll be sure to catch you

and I'll never let go

So, here's to my love

you are my purple cotton candy,

you are my sweet sweet dessert,

you are my honey bear,

you are my cute baby,

you are my bright beautiful moon,

you are my girlfriend,

you are my one and only love...

There's so much I want to say

There's so much I need to say...

But it is not yet time;

so for now, baby,

I just want you to know

just how lucky I am to have you by my side

all I ask is you stay by my side

till we're grey and old

Happy Valentine's Day!

I love you, honey..

For You (Angus & Julia Stone)

If I talk real slowly
If I try real hard
To make my point dear,
That you have my heart.
Here I go

I'll tell you,
what you already know.
Here I go.
I'll tell you,
what you already know.
If you love me,
with all of your heart.
If you love me,
I'll make you a star in my universe.
you'll never have to go to work.
you'll spend everyday,
shining your light my way.

If I talk real slowly
If I hold your hand
If you look real closely my love,
you might understand.
Here I go I'll tell you,
what you already know.
Here I go. I'll tell you,
what you already know.
If you love me,
with all that you are.
If you love me
I'll make you a star in my universe
you'll never have to go to work.
you'll spend everyday,
shining your light my way.
Here I go
I'll tell you,
what you already know.
Here I go.
I'll tell you,
what you already know.
If you love me,
with all of your heart.
If you love me,
I'll make you a star in my universe.
you'll never have to go to work.
you'll spend everyday,
shining your light my way.

Magic Words

What would you say
if I said I want you?
like a child wanting candy
like a girl wanting a new bag

What would you say
if I said I miss you?
like a polar bear misses ice
like a fish misses the sea

What would you say
if I said I love you?
like a boy who had just met a girl
like the moon loves the star

I would say it all
while holding your hand
and I would say it again
while kissing your lips

I would show it all
by holding you tight
I would show it again
by never letting go

I would do it all
just to hear you say...
I would do it forever
just so I can have those words

Say it to me now
and I will remember it forever
What I want most is to hear you say
It's as simple as one, two, three

We will always be together
We will always have each other;
We will never stop loving;
Till our hearts stop beating

Home

You can ask me how I fall
but I'll be the last to let you know
Cause you can only ever understand
when you're down here in the sand

There's no use for good feet
when you have nowhere to go
leave those boots behind
for someone with a place to call home

So lay down on your back
Look closely,
isn't life much brighter
when you can't see your shadow behind

Isn't it funny
just how hard it can be
to throw away something unwanted
Do you see the joke in it all?

Unbuckle those heavy boots
laced with tears of the past
throw down those glasses
scratched by the sands of time

I'll never know if I'm wrong
even more so when it's been this long
but then again, how could I ever know?
when this face is only just for show

What..?

What wakes you up in the morning?
What leaves you breathless?
What makes you come?
What makes you lean on me?

What makes green pierce so deep?
What makes a girl cry herself to sleep?
What makes this pain all so addicting?
What makes love all so exciting?

What drives me wild?
What keeps me acting like a child?
What grabs hold of my hands?
What makes me smile?

Romance Novel

I understand now what it feels like to be the moon on a cloudy night. Seemingly alone with nothing but thick dark clouds. You know the stars are right past the clouds but you're not sure. You have to just believe that the stars are there even if you can't see them. That's what trust feels like; having to believe in someone without real proof. And you are my moon, my love. I will forever remain by your side...I will forever be your star, even on dark cloudy nights. Trust in what you cannot see; trust in what you feel; trust in me; trust in my love; trust in your love for me.

Lets build a future together. Everyone wants power, money and happiness. I'm not greedy. I do not ask for happiness or money or power. I just want a lifetime with you. Lets live a future filled with me and you. I want you, even if we have tears or suffering; even when we feel lost and unsure; even if you feel you want to hit me... I will still want you by my side. I will still hold you close to me, honey. Because there is noone I'd rather cry with than you. So be my shoulder when I need you and the only tears I will make you shed are tears of joy.

You will forever be special. You might never truly understand what I mean but baby, I wish I could show you just how special you are to me. I don't want you to feel like you're the only girl in the world. I want you to know that you are my only girl. Your voice makes me speechless. Your smile makes me melt. Your laugh makes me jump. Your words make me listen. You make me yours. So stay with me... no matter what I say or how I say it. Just stay with me.

How can I say this all without being just a little melodramatic when our relationship is already set to be a romance novel. A book filled with many unknown experiences; we'll never know if it will have a sad ending. All I know is that we are in the middle of this love story; with you as my lover... Baby, isn't this a great book? I'd read it for sure... better yet, I'll write it...I'll write this romance novel just about the two of us.

I Miss You

I miss you without question
I miss your voice
when you tell me I love you
when you tell me I hate you
I miss your laugh
when I make fun of you
when you make fun of me
I miss the sound you make
when you just wake up
I'm not sure what sound that is
but it sounds like me when I wake up
just cuter and so much sweeter
I miss your shy voice
when I talk about holding you
when your parents are right behind you
I miss you so much
when you say I love you
without any reason whatsoever
I miss talking to you
when you put me to sleep
when I put you to sleep
its the best thing anyone has done for me
I miss you
everything about you
I want nothing less than
everything that is you...

You're my Present

I would like to think that I'm someone who is composed, analytical and cautious (especially when it comes to relationships). You, however, bring out the worst in me...and the best in me. And I'm loving every second of it. This definitely won't sound right but I've never missed someone so much that it hurts...yet, I feel happy, not just happy... I feel safe and at peace everytime I hear your voice. You don't know just how much your voice helps me through another day. Your sweet, playful voice makes me speechless. I want to hear your story. If possible, I would love to hear you tell me (in your cute little voice) the story of your life. And, in a few years, I would love to tell you (in my cute little voice) the story of our life. I would tell you a story of how we brought each other out of troubles; how we lived together when i got home; how we had a dog named Bob; how we fought; and how we loved. I would love to tell you everything. But for now, I'll take you on a ride you've never been on. I will drag you along with me as I take this next step in my life. As I leave my past behind, all I want is for you to be my future...just as you already are my present. Don't let go, honey... because I don't see any other way but to have you by my side.

Let me say...

I know sometimes
I say it too much
I can't help it
when I feel nothing else

When I see your picture
When I think of you
When I talk to you
When I dream of you

You know,
for someone who doesn't usually fall at all
I can't believe how I've fallen so far
I let myself fall...and I'd do it all over again

When you smile
When you laugh
When you cry
or even when you're shy

Let me be there with you
Just to say I've fallen in love
with all your ups and downs
Let me say just how much "I Love you"

Infinite

My words are all I have
without them, I am silenced
I hope you understand
these are my love letters

I don't think anyone could imagine
the infinite variety of words
rushing through my mind
everytime I write about you

Safe, close, comfort, love
friend, close friend, girlfriend
beauty, cute, caring, sweet
interesting, amazing, imperfect....perfect!

I'll be nice this time
I'll show you just a little bit
of why you make me
the luckiest guy alive

I don't need you to write

or sing, or dance, or jump

I write these love letters

just to hear you say "I love you"

Close your mind and shut your eyes

read with your heart

feel my heart through the words I write

Can you feel the warmth?

I will...Always

My eyes are opened
I see what I need now
I feel what I want now
Have you ever been lost?
well now I'm found
and you are my north pole
I'll never lose sight of you
I'll turn my life around
just to see you again
I'll jump out of a speeding car
if only it meant being with you
I'll throw away a part of me
only to see you smile
I'll hold a part of you
and I will never let go
I'll stand on the edge of a building
and reach out to the only one
the only one I've truly ever loved
I'll be your shoulder
I'll be your man
I'll be your dear
I'll be your star
Let me be there for you always
'Cause to me, it can only be you

Colours of Rainbows

I've finally lifted my pen
I'll put my thoughts to words
I'll write my words on paper
I'll send you a love letter

Honey, I'll write the first words
to this book of our life
It hurts to be away from you
But I never want to forget this pain

My heart is lost in love
nothing holding it down
But the head that cant believe
just how lucky a man can be

Can you feel this pain too?
Everytime I say I love you too
I lose myself in your voice
Like a man on a deserted island

But there has to be a reason
why this pain never stops me
from loving you more
everyday I hear your voice

Do you feel what I feel?
I feel the colours of rainbows
floating around the colour purple
dancing across the moonlit night

My head might tell me
that we are in a burning room
But if you will stay with me
I will dance with you in this fire forever

Dreams I Wish I Could Show You

Take a closer look
at this colourful world
I can see bright lights
and darker shadows

Can you see me?
in all this chaos
Look closely
as I wrap my hands around you

Do you feel me?
when my face presses against yours
Close your eyes
and hear my voice

I'll be gentle
when I hold your hand
feel my touch
with the bottom of your heart

Can your hear me?
when I whisper into your ears
"I love you baby"
I'll hold you close ever so softly

Do you like my dreams baby?
'Cause I'm loving every second of it
I can feel your warmth
As you smile right by my side

Tears of the Moon

I can't help but wonder
what we would be like together
I've never felt pain
Not from blood coming from another's vein

In the midst of all this joy
I'm afraid I'll be just another boy
But when you're sad
I want to be all that's not bad

I try... I will always try
to be there when you cry
your tears leave me helpless
the only time I'm ever speechless

You might not see it
You won't be able to hear it
'Cause I'll be the last to let you know
Just how much it hurts me so

When a tear flows down your eye
my heart falls out of the sky
Afterall, all I ever can do
is to try my best to be there with you