Misconceptions of Love (Part 6)

Despite the comfort, despite the security, despite William, deceit is the only plague in her dreams. William is home, yet its still not the same. She used to embrace him with such affection, such devotion, such warmth but now...it wasn't the same. The usual peck on the cheek was given only through hesitated routine. Her hands used to caress his somewhat unrefined cheeks with absolute passion, now she had lost that sense of amore. At night, she was accustomed to embracing his coarse body. The body which was, to her, once magnificent and robust...now merely indifferent. All this changes, not in actions but in the passion of the action, happened not because she had lost interest in him. No... no thats far too pathetic. It was her, her distress, her indecision, her deceit that had made her feel "no less than she should" she thought. All those promiscuos nights, those fornicated nights, those cursed nights... all those lies... she was unworthy. Logic was of no consolation right now for she had surpassed rationality. Her abominable "replacement" (as she once thought) of William had degraded her to that of an unworthy trollop. She could not bare the thought of accepting such allegiance from William but at the same time, she loved him dearly. She refused to let go of him; his keen smile, his fond gaze, his amity... So, this being said, she thought "that's all I can do for now"... that's all she can do; to detach, to sever, to live divvied, yet to love, to hope and to embrace what's left of the ruins of their lingering relationship.

William now realizes the hesitation, the unwillingness, the mere routines... its no longer his deranged imagination as he had once thought... Nevertheless, the love for her never did change. He embraced her as he always had, arms around her lower back, face tucked into the side of her delicate neck, harassing her dark silky hair, breathing in, once again, that familiar smell..."the scent of Afrodite herself". He sensed the growing crack between the walls of their love. And, to him, it was only him to blame, after leaving her for such a long time, she was still getting used to the past comfort which had finally returned. At least that's what he consoled himself with, but at the back of his mind, he knew there was more than just customary subject..."Of course, its probably just my imagination" he thought, keeping that ridiculous idea unreacheable for now but yet he offered the only thing he could... himself