Speechless

My world is burning
from the very core
You set a spark to my heart
now its spreading like wildfire
to the rest of me
I can't put it out
even if I wanted to
and I'm terrified...

Love Song

I haven't slept in days
still all I write
is nothing but love songs

I hear the birds sing
they sing a song of you and me
filled with all the colours of the rainbow
red, blue, orange
orange, pink and purple..
All the colours I feel

The sky turns blue
lit up by the morning sun
yet my day remains dark
till the moon lights up my day

the sunset's beautiful
still the sun must go down
I've seen this before,
all I see is a grey grey tune
but you show me a lighter side
a lighter side to keep me out of drowning waters

I'm afraid of what the night brings
the darkness hides away many pains
many untold stories
the moon is my only light
forever bright and bold
always by my side

To tell you the truth,
I never thought of where this could go
but we're here now
and all I want is to be there
I'll step out into the light
I'll leave the darkness behind
with the moon as my guide

I hope you can see
that you're in the middle
the middle of my very own love song

Just a Little More...

One fine day you'll see
time is our only friend
one fine day you'll see
time is our only foe

Time is our friend
Keeping us together
as the sands fall delicately
as we hold our hands together

Time is our enemy
Keeping us apart
as the sand falls endlessly
it almost seems like an eternity

Time keeps me safe
holding me tight
with what love I have with you
I hope it never ends

Time is killing me
slowly from the inside
everyday I take a breath
without you by my side

This is a story about the two of us
my world is burning
and I'm terrified
time has never made me a fool

So I'm down on my knees
fingers crossed inside out
I just need a little more time with you
I will always need just a little more...

Butterfly (Happiness)

You can dream of me
dropping my butterfly
but in the end,
I'll never let you go

You reeled me in;
the very first time
I heard you smile,
like a fish in a bowl

There is no reason
to reach out your hand
when its already with me
Lets stay this way for a while

My mind may stray
but my heart stays true
to the beautiful butterfly
bright and colourful

It is fine to blink

when there's something in your eye

it is fine to be just a little scared

of what love we have

We'll always have love
even when we're down and under
I'll keep you above drowning water
I'll love you with all I have

You took my cold
turned around my soul
showed me fire
fire I'll always treasure

Now I've caught my butterfly
and I'm never letting go
so hold on tight, baby
I'll take you on the ride of your life

Coal to Gold

This is truly what
your love means to me
All I ever touched turned to coal
But you showed me more than gold

For this I will gladly say
Baby, I love you more everyday
I will give you my heart
I don't want us to ever part

Hold my hands as I reach out
to the only girl I've ever
Loved without a single doubt
Can we make this even better?

Trust in me as I do you
I won't let you regret
what you are about to do
Afterall, love is just as blind as a bat

How did we...

How did we end up here, baby?
Met you on the dancefloor
Before we knew it
Ended up in the garden of love

Before I met you
I felt like a fallen leaf
Lying on the ground
good for nothing but to kick around

People came and went
Most kicked this leaf around
Others just stepped on it
Some stepped over it

but you came along
lifted me off the ground
brought me to this garden
this garden of love

Your love to me
is like sunshine to a starving tree
its like rainbows to a sad child
like how I love you

This glass heart is locked
somewhere within your hands
the key holds a bright light
one which only you could ever have

Let me tell you now
I am trapped
in this garden of love
with you and you alone

Happy Birthday

When I'm down and alone
drowning in the deep blue ocean
I still have you
sitting by the shore

When I'm up and about
Running fool's errands
I still have you
proof of what I live for

When I'm cold and shivering
Walking through the winter's blizzard
I still have you
just one kiss to keep me warm

When I'm lost and confused
Desperately looking for direction
I still have you
forever my magnetic north

When you're down and alone
Look for me
I will put a smile on your face

When you're up and about
Look for me
I will show you what to live for

When you're cold and shivering
Look for me
I will hold you close to me

When you're lost and confused
Look for me
I will help you find a way

Afterall, it's only right
that you lean on me
Cause, in the end,
you will always have me

Happy Birthday,
My Beautiful Moon.
I will be your star forever
no matter how far I am
All you have to do is call
I love you, baby...

Tusks the Elephant

Once upon a time, there lived a young elephant. His name was Tusks. Tusks was a tough elephant; he had a tough exterior. Tusks was a lonely elephant. He lived alone in a glass house and all he had was a heart made of glass. His heart was small and fragile. But little did he know, this glass heart held a sparkling star within. A wise old elephant once told him, "the sparkling star is the key to life's happiness. The only way to ever see this light is to find his beautiful moon; a moon that could open his delicate glass heart".

Tusks had met many other elephants in search of his happiness; in search of his moon; but other elephants never could hold his fragile glass heart. You see, many elephants have come and gone but Tusks had never let them touch his glass heart. One unexpected day, Tusks had been tired of being alone. He showed his heart to an elephant he once liked; her name was Jay. It was hard for Tusks to show his glass heart to anyone, he was a scared little elephant. Jay looked at Tusks' glass heart; she tried to open the glass heart to release the sparkling star but she dropped the glass and shattered it to pieces.

Tusks had thought that he had found happiness since the glass was now in pieces but he was wrong. All he felt was sadness. Tusks slowly picked up the broken glass and put it back together. Tusks began to give up on the moon. He was starting to think that the wise old elephant was just another crazy old elephant. It took a long while for Tusks to put his glass heart back together but slowly and surely, he did.

Tusks went back to the wise old elephant hoping to find the direction of the moon. The wise old elephant said "you can never find the moon if you're always looking at ground around you". Tusks didn't quite understand what this meant. But, he didn't want to be lonely so he searched and searched. However, Tusks was a scared little elephant. He was afraid that his glass heart might shatter yet again.

Like any other tired elephant, Tusks began to give up. He began to accept his loneliless. Of course, he was sad, but he had searched high and low with no success. When Tusks began to walk back to his lonely glass house, he saw a panda. This panda's name was Niki. Niki was friendly and beautiful. But Tusks could see that she was tired; just as he was tired of being alone. Niki was different. You see, Niki never showed her true feelings to other pandas; she was always full of energy, even when she was sad. Tusks wanted to see her heart. Tusks felt that he had to care for Niki when she was happy and when she was sad.

For the first time in his life, Tusks had found someone he loved. Niki loved him just as much and Tusks knew it. He felt safe with her. He felt love from her. Before he knew it, Tusks had offered his glass heart to Niki. He was scared at first; he was scared she might break it like the other elephants. But Niki took his glass heart with confidence and opened it up. Tusks had never felt so happy. Tusks had never felt his sparkling star shine so brightly... till now. Niki was the key to his glass heart; the brilliant moon to his sparkling star.

His journey with Miki had only just begun...

Dear "Them",

We see rainbows in the rain
But they only see
whats left of the water in the drain

I tell them that I love you
yet, all they could ever say
was nothing more than "be careful"

I tell them why I love you
yet, all they ever asked
was nothing less than "how could you?"

I tell them how much I want you
yet, all they ever cared for
was noone but themselves

I tell them you are my moonlight
yet, all they ever told me
was 'the moon is way too far away"

Now, I tell them nothing
'Cause at the end,
I only ever wanted to tell you

How much I love you
Why I love you
How much I want you

My beautiful moonlight,
I don't care about them
Because I only believe in you

A Friend and a Girl

I had a friend
who loved a friend
they cried when they could
they smiled when they should
they lived far from one another

This friend had a name
the name was...its all the same
All the same played a game
and I always thought it was lame

This game was simple
they fought when they could
they loved when they should
but that brought about a dimple

I never really understood
what was so good
Thought it was just false hope
that could only leave you to mope

But now,
I would like to take a bow
For they are proof
that I am just another goof

Now, I see the sense in it all
Now, I see the love all-in-all

I met a girl
she took me for a twirl
swept me off my feet
made my heart skip a beat

I want to take her out
show her my world
I love her without a doubt
enough to travel across the world

Girl,
I miss you when its bright out
I miss you when it rains
I miss you when I'm alone
I miss you when I'm not

Take a step with me and be bold
'Cause I want to always hold
onto you when you're cold
until you're grey and old

River of Water

Found my myself
down by the river
picking sticks and stones
saw a girl in black
right across the river

This is a story
about the both of us
it is an extraordinary thing
in this garden of love
there is only a picture of you

The sunset is beautiful
still, the sun goes down
open your heart
in this river of water
show me the sunrise

Trust in me
I will find your heart
hidden in a painting
together,
we can make it a masterpiece

When you're standing
at the edge of nothing
I will cross that river
step out into the thin air
'cause you know I'm in love with you
You know I always will be

To You and You Alone

I love you for more reasons
than I can ever write
I love you for more ways
than I can ever explain
But I'll show just a tiny glimpse
Of what I love the most

I love that you are so beautiful
so much more than you think
I love to hear you laugh
even more when its because of me
I love the way you're shy
and all I want is to see you blush

I love that you love kids
as much as I think they are all rascals
I love to hear your cute voice
when I wake you up from your dreams
I love the way you listen
to every bit of my hyperactive rants

I love that you remember
the tiny details of everything I say
I love to hear your sweet little voice
when you're tired and about to sleep
I love the way you always tell me sweet dreams
Baby, you know I will be dreaming of you

I love that you understand me
As much as I try to understand you
I love to hear everything you have to say
because I want to know every part of you
I love the way you want to see me
Just as much as I want you

I love you for who you are
beautiful and forever interesting
I love you like the star loves the moon
You are the only moon this star can see
Will you trust me with your heart
Because I want you all to myself

You might think that this is a long list
But these hands could never explain
just how much I truly want you
just how much I truly love you

So will you hold my hand
As I keep you safe and warm
And I promise to be nice
To you and you alone

Me, Myself, and I

I can't remember
the last time I've felt this lost
Never felt this alone

My life turns blue
as I try to shoot
Yet another shot of jack

I try to cry
So my river would never be dry
I try to run
away from these neverending lies

How can you understand
what it means to be happy
When you've never been sad
When you've never been alone

As this bottle touches my lips
As I feel the burn down my throat
As I break another glass
As I break another bottle...

I fall, my fall's going to break
My fall's going to break my wall
This wall can't take another day
Not another day with me, myself and I

There's no use hiding it anymore
There's no use deceiving
Noone wants to be alone

Dim Star; Bright Moon

Travelling alone
In search of
destination

Find myself
Shining lonelily
In the dark sky

Feeling disposed
Others like me
Have burnt out

When I'm down
I look to my only friend
From afar

Find myself exposed
How can I
When I'm all alone

I'll pack my bags
Cause its about time
I met my only friend

You can't be just a friend
Cause you are the only one
who sees through this dim light

You are the only one
Who finds warmth in this star
And I never know why

This star is dim
But you see the light
And feel the warmth

Time will bring
us closer
My bright, beautiful moon

Seasons Change

A new season is upon me
Autumn has came and left again
just as any doubts I had for you
A new day has dawned

I've never seen
A moon as bright as this
I've never felt
This unknown feeling

Your words are like the winter's cold
It is direct and strong
It is beautiful but dangerous
Yet, I've always loved the winter

Winter nights are cold
But the moonlight still shines brightly
As the sky is clear
I stare at the moon from a far far away place

Don't be afraid
I will be your shining star in the open galaxy
I will keep my moon close to my heart
Where its safe and warm
So you don't have to be alone anymore

Tell me I was Right; Tell me I am Right

Tell me I was right
When I believed in you
Tell me I was right
When I held my heart out to you

You did not let me in
You did not let me see
what you truly had
within your frail little heart

I held out my shield
So you could take it from me
You held my heart in your warm hands
Saw right through my cowardice

I want to breathe that familiar scent
I want to see that moonlit face
I want to hear that cute voice
I want to feel those warm hands on my heart

Tell me I am right to miss you
Tell me I am right to care
Tell me I am right to want you
Cause I'm losing myself to you

This is a Story...

As I wander through
These sleepless nights
Insomnia takes control
over dreams of a brighter day

This is a story

Not about boy meets girl

This is a story

Without a girl at all

Words can't explain
This melancholy feeling
Yet I try to justify this
with words I can't explain

"Pull me ashore"

Is what I would have said

But there's only so much

That a boy could take

I'll hold my breath

As I'm losing the light

Sinking deeper into the ocean

Find it hard to keep afloat

I'm leaving this feeling behind
Caged in a prison without a key
I'm leaving this feeling behind
In a place I will never be

Something That is You

You thought me to trust
To hold close
what is precious to me
Without faltering

You showed me the future
The end of the beginning
which was not to be
The beginning of an end

You brought me sunshine
All that was bright
All that was light
All that was mine

You gave me the truth
Something only for me to lose
Something I will live for
Something that is you

Live for Mistakes Like These

I told you not to be a baby
When you cried for me
I told you to grow up
And you left me

I stood alone as a boy
Who had just lost his only friend
I watched you as you left
I'm losing the sunshine

There's no need to hide it anymore
I can see right through that mask
Laughter is not meant to
Hide the tears of a baby girl

This world is a sinking ship
I am terrified
I don't have enough time with you
Don't let me drown

I'm petrified
This could be a mistake
But I'm only just a boy
Who lives for mistakes like these
So will you be my girl?

Weatherman

Dark clouds consumed
All of what was left
The remains of my hope
was washed away by the hurricane

I found myself talking
to the bright side of the wall
Just to hide the dark side once again
White walls were painted black

On a rainy day like this
there can be no sun
at least none of which matters
Hell, nothing matters

all of the colours in the world
could not paint this canvas
all of the words in my mind
could not explain this anxiety

I'm the clear blue sky
behind the morning weatherman
What else am I to say
If not "Don't wash me away"

Smile, Again?

Yet another time; lost in the sun
With our feet up in the air
We laughed at the sky
Our hands felt the ground
As it held us together

I saw your smile before
Can you smile for me once more?
Can you smile once again?

I held your hand
And took you away
away to the ocean's floor
I never knew
Just how bliss ignorance could be

I saw your smile before
Can you smile for me once more?
Can you smile once again?

My feet took off the ground
My hands reached for the sky
My heart leapt for the ocean
All when I saw your smile

I don't remember that smile
That smile you once had
The one you had when you were all alone...

Deep Blue Sea

How can I say goodbye when my anchor has not come afloat?

I lost my mind a while ago
Left it back at a familiar place
A place where "we" were born
The place where "we" last met

My life was filled with anxiety.
I couldn't even find my way home.
Yet, you strolled in here with such subtle confidence.
You robbed me of my hesitation.
Replaced it with dreams of a promise land.

When others aim their guns at me,
You stood as my shield
Bold and unwavering, confident...
Trusting the power of your love

I lost my mind a while ago
Left it back at a familiar place
A place where "we" were born
The place where "we" last met

When others tried to rock your boat
I stood firm as your anchor
Leaving an unmoved boat
A boat which can't float

I held you down with blood and iron
I had forgotten what it all meant
I had lost sight of your butterfly wings
I had lost sight of you in this deep blue sea

I lost my heart a while ago
Left it back at a familiar place
A place where "we" were born
The place where "we" last met

How can I say goodbye when my heart remains in yours?

The Painting

I've always thought of myself as a loner. I never needed many friends, I never told anyone my deepest fears and my darkest secrets. I had my close friends as everyone did but that was about it. There were no need for "extras" in the picture of my life. But I was never lonely. I enjoyed the time I had to myself; the time where I had no need to lower my standard of thought and understanding to the rest of the world. I didn't like people. No, actually it was more that I didn't like to be in the presence of ignorance... at least not all the time. And to me, people were ignorant. People see no difference between the good and the bad; the loyal companions beside us and the backstabbing pricks behind us. Ironically, people would rather differentiate people through race and gender. I knew I was ignorant too but how can that not be categorized as the purest and dumbest form of ignorance? How am I not to be a loner with the mass public of George Bush's and Socrates wannabes. Or at least thats what I thought.

But, not for the first time, I've been made a fool. Since I've come back from Malaysia, i've been trying to figure out what has changed. I've gone back many times before, although for a shorter period of time, but I couldn't figure out what changed me this time around. My close friends were still close, and so were my family. My house stayed the same and so did my mutt of a dog. Aside from having a car, there was no real difference on the surface. But deep down in me lurked a different side of me that was crying out for life; a different life where people cared for what I said; a life where people would contradict my ideas; a life where life was not all about me. I had lost the life in me at some point or another. I had lost the self I once had and loved. For whatever reason, I became satisfied with my own ignorance afterall. But the people I have always known back home and the many I have recently met had brought part of me back. Its amazing yet baffling how, in just 4 months, those very people had partly undid 4 years of my self-indulgence. Its funny how 4 years of my philosophies had been flushed to the drain in just 4 months. You see, those people were not just anyone to me, at that point, I realized, they were true friends. The ones many people have left behind; the ones many people misunderstand; and the ones I treasure most. Some of them might have been rude at times; some might have acted stupid at times and some I never even knew. But afterall, they were my rude and stupid friends which I never even knew before.

The life began once I saw the colours in their hearts. Some were red with passion, some green with jealousy, some pink with love, and some blue with joy but all those colours made a grand painting. A painting that I shall always treasure.